american refugees

my heart goes out to all those devistated by hurricane katrina and displaced from their homes and lives and safety.

i wonder if having refugees who have to be shipped across borders to go live in refugee camps (the astrodome-will they kick them out on sundays?) will make us as americans any more empathetic to refugees around the world, or will make our government act in more responible ways. lets see.
meanwhile if i had a couch, and you lived in new orleans, mine would be yours.

also check out yesterdays' times editorial talking about how bad planning on local and federal levels led to this being such a disaster. and why does the gov suck so much. all i hear on the news is how we have enough oil but problems with refineries so we are releasing oil from the reserves-that does nothing about the refineries or gas prices or conservation. why do all the jazzy things that look good just screw us more in the end. and why don't we listen to the experts-that's really what i don't get. i want children and i want grandchildren and i want somewhere for them to live safely (in all respects of that word) certainly it won't be louisana...

so much reading and i'm supposed to go to the gym and have a life and be doing stuff full time

and i now have no commute to do reading on. its hard forme to get any reading done on the f train before jay street-as i usually don't have a seat. and now my commute ends before jay street. when i will read for pleasure again i don't know. and i have so much reading to do:
reading for school/classes-a lot.
reading for student teaching
reading for preofessional development that i want to do for class and student teaching
reading for pleasure which is both books/the occasional mag/rag and all the online stuff i read regularly
reading to know what the hell is going on in the world

and i go to the gym and i have no money?
guess this is why grad students are crazy!

roommates and psuedointellectual babble

so i think my roommie that is staying has taken upon herself some passive aggressive measures of not taking on any cleaning responsibilities and hoarding toilet paper in her room out of protest. ok so she has been the only one to take out the trash, but i do other shit and we all buy toilet paper. and if people start using napkins we will all be up shits creek when our toilet explodes.

in an update the vball roommie may not be going to europe anymore, may have been a phantom offer.

picked up the lastest believer mag, oh how i love it. it has zadie smith interviewing ian mccewn. i hate him. i cannot believe how celebrated he is. we'll get back to that in a minute though. every issue has 3 or 4 interviews. many of them of writers. this one (zadie and ian) is billed as a conversation. there is a note letting us know that this is one of multiple writer interviewing writer essays that will soon be published by the mcsweeny's empire. cool i say. then i say, wait a minute-aren't all your interviews writers interviewing writers. the interviewer is writing it up and certainly the mcsweeny's empire arranged this or asked for it as much as any of their other interviews where the interviewer is billed as the believer instead of by hir name. granted one interviewer was the lead singer from that band, not the pixies, much newer and all indie rock and stuff, but i can't think of whom. ok so now that i think about it not all their interviews are with writers, some are artists using different mediums, but still...is it b/c zadie and ian are wildly famous and we are all madly jealous of them and want to be them a little bit. ok and you smug ones who are saying i don't want to be them, your just lying to yourselves. i mean she had white teeth published at 24.

congrats

to my outgoing roommate who is no longer going up-slope but got offered a position playing vball in slovenia. she leaves soon. sad to be leaving the new boyfriend, but awesome for her.

another reason to live in the northeast/that's not the guy

the northeast doesn't get a ton of natural disasters-most hurricanes don't make it up here, very few tornadoes, not on a fault line....
last night i heard a hilarious story of a guy who ran from the cops after he was caught urinating in public. he ended up running into his apt, into the bathroom turning off the lights, jumping in the shower and pulling the curtain closed. the cops bust in, go into the bathroom, TURN ON THE LIGHTS AND PULL BACK THE CURTAIN TO SEE A FULLY CLOTHED GUY JUST STANDING THERE and say "no, that's not the guy" maybe you had to be there but it cracked me up.
drank heffewiesen last night, but mainly just b/c someone else was buying. i generally am not into beers that are served with fruit-or that you can't see through, but the lemon does make it taste better.
the past 24 hours have been my time to run into people. at teh coop (before 11am on a sunday) i ran into 3 people and kept thinking why the hell are you all awake/why the hell am i awake, but them i remembered i'm not one of those young college kids anymore, i'm in my late 20's and responsible and shit. i went on a jdate (yeah i finally bit the bullet, but only for a month) with a kid i had met a bunch of years ago at someone's apt. later at the bar with schwartz i ran into another greenpoint avodahnik-fitting as we were in greenpoint. then this morning walking to the garden to get tea, damn i miss that place and greenpoint in general it felt so good to be back, but was crazy to see the number of young white people hipsters and not on the streets last night, i ran into my old coworker and her boyfriend going to the train. i crashed at schwartz's last night, his new apt is so much nicer than our old one, although his room is kinda small and not much air circulation going on.
oh and next chance you get check out the hungry march band. an atypical marching band, but pretty damn good none-the-less.

morning shout outs

-us for having a new roommie, check in hand. she's young and new to the city but she's a chef in training. seems like an ok trade-off
-to the cohifers (their last names do not blend easily) on their engagement. more guys that i've dated/hooked up with getting married, and this time to a friend of mine. but i always thought he was one of the good ones.
-happy belated b'day to one of my favorite cooks, ms nyu teach.

So who knew how pleasant sitting out by the river next to a roaring fake campfire could be? And to think it could happen at the marriot courtyard waterfront.

Apparently the defense’s bfriend thinks I look israeli. I don’t think so. But I do like him and they seem super happy together. He reminds me a lot of dr raz, a former post doc I used to work with, also israeli. They are of a different stereotype, not the ones I grumble about on the subways, ok I would grumble about them for different reasons.

Last week I waS at a large dinner party, I think I mentioned this, and was hit on by the one guy there that I would not want to be hit on by. He’s 6’3” do I like tall guys? He didn’t speak with proper grammar (right I’m one to criticize but still) her giggles a lot- have no patience, and I thought he was 23 when he’s 29. neither are bad ages. Ok 23 is young for me, but I go for either guys who are ageless, or who are older. But thanks to friendster he asked me out. I think I will need to say that I started seeing someone.

My mom told me that she thought it was good best man boy never called me back. She thought we would date for a year and then I would decide I didn’t want to marry him. Ok so maybe it is a pattern, but still. I’m not sure where she was coming from, the she doesn’t want me to be needlessly hurt, or she wants me to get hitched soon side.

I splurged and took amtrak back. Its enough I have to get on the subway.. going to the burgh was good. Got some family time, got some green in, went for a swim. I’m kinda sad to go back to Brooklyn I could use another day of a break and another evening on my parents porch-officially summer nighttimes on their porch are one of my favorite things ever.

newsflash

remember how i have to stay in a hotel tomorrow even though i'm in the burgh? well guess what time i have to leave the house tomorrow morning? 7am. my mom and i are not pleased and also unsure as to what to do with those first 5 hours of the day. my dad asked what would we do if we were on vacation here? duh! sleep.

even so it is gorgeous here, and sitting on the porch listening to the cicadas is very relaxing and i think what i needed before starting this new school adventure. i also need to see my grandmother. it scares me how old and weak she is getting. i mean they are 96 and 97 but still....

fuck this roommate thing i'm going home

it will be a stressful trip but i also think it will make me feel better to go and see my grandmothers and see the vase i got for my parents, and maybe get a little sitting on the porch listening to crickets time before we move into the hotel.

i also got my first museum gig today. i will be a docent at the eldridge street project. its volunteer but only one day a month and certainly good on the resume....

coney island for a little sun and gawanus for a not dog. pretty good day i'd say.

it is and it isn't

had an amazing doctor's experience yesterday. well, it was just a physical before my insurance runs out...but my appointment was at 1 and i was seen at 1:05-how amazing is that. i like my doc, and really like the practice, they cover a lot, she's young and cool. and i finally got tested. i figured it was about time. since i demand to know that my partners are clean, its about time i stepped up to the plate, even though i'm 99.9% sure i'm clean.

also had an amazing nectarine yesterday. so ripe. so yum.

the apt drama continues. a 18 year old brooklyn college freshman showed up with her dad to our open house yesterday. that, that was not ok was the only thing the roomie and i could agree on. is it really so bad of me to not want to live with a 22 year old who has never been to new york before? i don't think so. the roomie and i are not perfectly suited for each other, making this more difficult and making me contemplate moving possibly. arg.

in any case i'm going to the beach today. i deserve it.

later.

attention

all surfers who come straight to my apartment after a day at the beach, please clean the shower after use. not only am i jealous that you were at the beach, but its no fun to get into a filthy shower. thanks. the management.

3 new things i love

SO on this humid afternoon i was introduced (using that word liberally) to 3 new things that i think are awesome. 1) paddle boating in prospect park. its actuality kinda a rip off, esp b/c if you are a minute late you lose your deposit, but if you are 2 hours late you also only lose your deposit. next time i'm out for all day. but it was really nice and pleasant and pretty to be in the middle of the lake. 2) flatbush food coop. you know how i love grocery stores. this coop is obviously organized around organic, it is not cheap at all and you have to work 2 hours a week before you get a decent discount. 3) new coffee shop/bookstore vox pop. its not new, just how often do i find myself in ditmas park-not so much. thanks to la refugee for showing me around.

last night was norm's (code name not the one your thinking of) birthday festivities-a rather large dinner party/shabbat dinner and then some more people over for a plain old party. of course the 1 guy there that i could have no interest in (having met him previously) tried to ask me out. i couldn't quite get myself out of the situation, but he wouldn't write anything done (keeping shabbat and all) and i was able to escape without giving out my number. i find out that he's 29, i would have pegged him for 23, 24 tops. for the party park in walks a park slope celebrity. i think he's only a celebrity if your under 35 and go to the coop weekday evenings. this is actually the second party we have both been at this summer. it was a lot less surprising to see him last night than to wqlk into best man's place to see him drinking absinthe, as norm knows everyone and i didn't know that best man's roommate works at the coop.

oh and i had to order more textbooks today. which sucks-more money, more reading. there was sure no way that i got the optional ones. but the real kicker is that not having an office, i had to have them sent to my doorman lacking house. luckily i should be able to get to the post office in the next week. sucks about packages in this city.

have you noticed that outdoor atms are back in nyc. seriously all over the place

last night was the house boyfriend of the 12th st ladies' birthday. we went to baggot inn for their bluegrass jam. when i could hear the music it was good. i wished i had chilled up front at the beginning with the group that sounded more like a trad session than bluegrass. oh well. its always on weds.

i have been doing some fringe fest volunteering giving me (and guate jenn as she has been around to use them) free seats to shows. have i see anything that people are talking about no. have i seen some ok stuff yes. the first show i saw "hit" was good. solid drama, pretty good acting. second show "three ring circus" kinda sucked. it wouldn't have sucked if either 1) the acting and (directing was much better (here for the first time could i tell where directing actually makes a difference, his blocking was ridiculous and use of quick changes in pace and timing hinted at the changes he was trying to make but didn't really do it) or 2) it hadn't been ideas that i have heard a 1,000 times before from my neurotic jewish friends.
tonight we saw "yes we have no bananas" at ps122. it was much more of a performance art peice and i found it entertaining. when jenn and i discussed what it meant we didn't agree (which is fine) and also didn't quite have a clue. it was inspired by dada. what is dadaism? i should know, but i don't. then we went to teany. i've never been. the service was slow, but the hot chocolate good.

oh and i stopped into a wine tasting today. yum to the 2 white wines i tried. the red was weird, they were chilling it. i almost bought a bottle. but then i remembered my budget.

and also if i were to live in manhattan i think would want to live in battery park city. there are a million reasons not to live there, but that the esplanade and accompanying parks are so nice, especially early evenings in the summer when the sun is warm and low in the sky its so fucking lovely. seriously, made my day (especially after my museum going plans were foiled.)

also i recommend the book i just finished: peresepolis 2, its a graphic novel and you don't necessarily have to have red the 1st one (about the islamic revolution in iran) to get the 2nd one. if this is really her life and its not overly exaggerated like that in AHBWOASG than why do good writers always have so much shit happen in their lives? i'll stick with lousy to mediocre writing ability and a handful of readers if it means my life will be calmer (and yes people i know that's not how it works...)

big changes

possibly the biggest shock-going to the strand is now a well lit pleasant experience. how did i miss this major remodeling effort. in any case i support it.
in other news my last day of work (after 4 years) was on friday. it was anti-climatic. i was taken to a bad lunch, the good place only had seats outside and it was hotter than hell, and given a jade bonsai which i think is totally suffering in my living room. in my former boss' excellent social graces he picked up my meal, but not that of the brand new employee of his that started on friday. whatever. i actually still owe them some work, but i am done soon enough. i need to get it over with so i don't have to think about it anymore...
it still doesn't quite feel like i'm done with work. just like it doesn't feel like mickey left. after the weekend of goodbye celebrations and a final night that i succeeded in at least making memorable and one last bagel world trip, she took off on tuesday. we'll miss her, she'll miss us.
to keep myself occupied i've been volunteering for the fringe festival. its ridiculously easy. i also saw two shows last night. they were ok. the first one was a drama and it was pretty good. the second one was a one man neurotic jewish kid in his 20s trying to figure out his life and his stance on israel/palestine. ideas that i've heard all before and staging that needed some serious help. but it was free and more power to him.

finished great gatsby. the last page was good and nicely wrapped it all up. i might post some of it here, its a nice passage about moving on.

announcing that you are being rude, doesn't stop you from being rude

and gothamist is right, how are we supposed to deal in august when our shrinks are on vacation.
oy vey. time to write an apology email.

i'm kinda bitchy when i'm tired

case in point-my lack of excitement at last night, but as we all know, i generally do not 'go out' on friday nights. certain exceptions can be made. mickey is having a going away weekend of events and chill suggested that we, me and milo's mom do some special presentation. this was decided to be friday night at karaoke. i wasn't going to go before this was decided. i don't go out friday nights, mickey wouldn't care. but i knew by singing partners would be pissed if i ditched. so i'm over at mollie rose's with a friend of hers and we are sitting outside eating mad yummy food (EK cook for me ANYTIME) and drinking wine by candlelight with this gorgeous tree waving above us in the wind. i do did not want to go. my plan was to get there and sing and walk out, but of course that meant staying til practically the end. while it was kinda fun, i would have rather been in bed, and i didn't practice my part. oops. oh well. she loved it.

i also found out that i have at least one more reader than i thought. going to have to start watching out who i trash talk, though most of the trash talking on here is self directed so i'm not so worried.

ok must make bed, make room look less like a disaster area and go to gym for at least a half an hour, i hate how pregnant i look...

oh and even though i need to do a bunch of trusty excel work. i'm done. no more sackler for me. but two more much needed paychecks. coworker friend and i raided the supply closet before i left. how tacky, yet useful.

haven't complained about the love life in a while so i will now

i want a brooklyn boy pure and simple. was at a cyclones game tonight which was awesome and you know how much i LOVE coney island. but all i could think was wow i'd love to come back on a date. i've given up on nerve and craigslist, esp as my last makes me feel better post didn't really get any responses, less than usual and none that led to a date. i had been having some thoughts about doing something stupid with a specific friend of mine who i have a fucked up history with but after the best man situation i realize that it would totally be to no one's benefit, which leaves me high and dry over here on 4th ave. the part of me that thinks having a boyfriend would makes things better is in the wrong, but i do think it would make things more fun. requirements: must be as in love with coney island as i am!

having that crazy anxious feelings

i have a lot to do at work before i leave. dealing with finding a new roommate is annoying, and time consuming.
i spoke with mickey who had her last day of work yesterday and they got her a mini-ipod in addition to lunch and saying great things about her. now i know things would be different if i were the only one leaving as opposed to everyone and their mother leaving, but it makes me a little sad i won't have anything like that.
i went for drinks with chill last night and mickey's leaving of course came up and it made me pretty sad.
talked to silver last night, that was nice, he was very supportive, too bad i was practically falling asleep on the phone....
must work.

STOP THE PRESSES

i salted my food at dinner tonight. to anyone who has cooked with me you know how big a deal that was. but my (failed, but still yummy) attempt at gazpacho just needed some spice. i love that its tomato season. i am anxiously awaiting local corn in the coop but until then i get a pint of cherry tomatoes and eat em all up b;c they are just so damn yummy. its awesome. tomatoes rest of the year do not compare.


anyone need a home sept 1st for $750 in park slope? my roommate is leaving (on less than 30 days notice!) non-smoking, no pets and vegetarian preferred. M/F straight/queer welcome.

a couple quick shout outs of support:
-to hoya and her fam after her aunt passed away. hopefully there is comfort in the end of suffering and pain.
-a refuah shlemah (good health wishes) to my grandmother who is apparently in the hospital with a little fluid in her lungs. it can't be that bad, she went in sunday night and i just heard about it b/c i happened to call home today

eire here i come

although the trip is so far away that they don't sell airplane tickets yet. the occasion you may ask? the kinasecasters are getting married in county wicklow and i am so pumped! for them. for the wedding. to hit the west coast of ireland (yes the wedding is on the east) te he. must start saving now!

3.5 days of work left. i am so not pleased with what i have to do as well as overwhelmed, that really i'm not doing much and just hitting refresh on email.

went to dinner at citrus last night. recommendation: don't go there, over priced random and mediocre food and as my companion pointed out we were by far the chillest people there. after dinner we went for a walk and walked up CPW and past her grandparent's building (citrus is right next to where her grandparents park) and low and behold re ran into them on the street. i ocasionally run into people-its not that weird and in pgh i run into slip and slide buddy's grandmother a bunch, but it was odd to be with someone as she ran into her grandparents. she says she probably does it once a month, sometimes at fairway... oh how everywhere is kinda like upstreet to me.

mickey leaves one week from today. my coworker returned from europe to remind me how much i like her and am sad she's going to ardmore-look at her living on the mainline.

the small ways in which grad school can change your life

b/c of tilda's grad school experiences i have a new favorite rice-butanese red rice. tilda wrote a white paper on bhutan in grad school. one day before she was coming to visit i saw bhutanese rice in the coop. i bought some. here's the thing its damn yummy and good for you. but it is significantly more expensive than other rice. and it makes things red.

went to Atlantic city this weekend. it felt like a whirlwind tour leaving my house at 7;30 am on sat and returning by 5 on sunday. it felt like the most time we spent doing anyone thing was waiting for the bus. the bus ride down sucked. we are all a little out of it when we got off, but i won $48 in the slots from the bus promotion (i proceeded to lose all of it, well not the $20 that paid for lunch at a most excellent sub shop. i'm still a little bitter though that they wouldn't put mushrooms on my sub (not what they thought it would come with and while they would leave ingredients off a sub they would not add any or make substitutions. but the place was damn yummy nonetheless) the beach was nice, the boardwalk over whelming the casinos garrish and tacky looking, well mainly just trump plaza [i think i would shoot myself if the only job prospects i had were to work in a trump building i can't take all the fake gold plating and lights, bleh] got some free fruity drinks at the beach bar since our waitress closed out all her tabs and left her shift without us getting the bill. sweet, and outside during late afternoon sunshine, you know that is what i loved. hiked out to our hotel where we went for a quick swim. i wasn't going to go but then just dove in. i think it has been 5 years since i was in a swimming pool, sat outside of them a couple times, but never in. i miss pools, i used to love them so much as a kid and couldn't imagine that there would be a time in the future that i would rather do something with my summer late afternoon than be at the pool. of course, its going to take me a week to get my hair in any kinda decent shape. we ended up dining at planet hollywood-barf, but the rainforest cafe was all booked up. today was basically transit home. last night i watched someone lose $300 at a time more money than i make in 2 months in ten minutes. scary. late night on the boardwalk with funnel cake and root beer was also sweet even if we were exhausted.

shout outs of thanks to the 12th street ladies for such a yummy and lovely shabbat dinner on friday.

my last week of work starts tomorrow and i'm kinda terrified. mainly b/c the is so much to do and the shit has hit the fan and i'm unsure how much responsibility my boss is ascribing to me and how much to him and how much just shit happening, though things are in a much worse place than just shit happening.

i should go to bed to help my cold and try and be functional at work tomorrow, but i have thank you notes to make.
and i want humidity to go away.

never get on a russian submarine

seriously, under no circumstances. even if you come up with 20 million dollars and they successfully launch you into space, stay away from their marine vehicles.

basically kickball=fun. bouncy purple ball=fun. leaving work at 5:15 and playing in the park=fun. coworkers coming out=fun. a good b'day celebration all around. i think its possible that my mom thought my birthday was yesterday though (its today) and she wants me to come home for thier 40th wedding anniversary (if they don't go to nemicolin for 2 days) i should come home on the wrong day. do i really want to fly through philly to go over night and i think i have a doctors appt on their anniversary.

overhwelmed by work. arg. but am tonight hopefully selling my baker's rack. a little cash and a little less stuff in the apt. sweet.

oh i picked up the great gatsby today to read again. i finished small island the other night and didn't think i should have to read school books on my b'day and looking around my bookshelf i had either already read everything or had no interest in reading it. i picked up gatsby a few years ago b/c i remembered loving it when i was in high school. seriously enthralled by every single word. 20 pages in this time around and i am just not yet swept up by the beauty of the language. i'll give it a few more pages.

now i remember why i wanted to quit my job

today has been pretty stressful at work. it highlights some of my struggles (pc term for weaknesses) like detail oriented or giving a shit about numbers. in the end it will be fine. ultimate responsibility comes down to my boss, but some responsibility does lie with me for the fuckups that were found. i'm glad to be cutting out of here though and moving into a profession/hopefully jobs that play to more of my strengths.

oh should i move? i may have the possibility. i don't want to deal with it for a month from now. 75 bucks cheaper, right on the 2/3. thoughts?

i forgot the most exciting parts

1. i officially quit today. i wrote the letter, printed it out, signed it and dropped it off. last pay check comes august 26th.

2. i saw a 2 month old red-tailed hawk crying to be fed in central park. i couldn't wait to see the dad come by and drop off food. wish i could have though. sunday we saw what we think is a falcon in the park. very pretty birds.

just like the olden days

1. i haven't stopped getting tea in the morning i need to. its a quick way to save some cash. but i have started asking for it with half sugar. basically now i am just drinking warm brown milk. i'm not complaiing and maybe i should steep my tea longer (but then i have to steep it the entire 6 train ride which is too long) but otherwise i never drink milk. when i was a kid it had to be super dooper cold for me to drink it, if it sat out for more than a minute it was too warm and gross tasting for me. i always asked for water with dinner.

2. i signed up to volunteer some shifts at the fringe festival to get some free passes to see shows. this is how i plan to spend my two weeks off, that and at the beach. of course i have actual classwork to do during those times...

3. last night i stopped by the 12th street ladies to try and get mollie rose to buy plane tickets for the future rabbi's wedding. he was actually there and we sat around chatting and being such nerds. at one point we had a comprehensive (but oddly organized) encycoldpedia of new york city, a book about the history of times square, a dictionary-which mollie rose was reading the how to use section of, someone's notes from a class on evolution and a steven j gould book in front of us and we were pouring through them looking for cool facts. but as my high school bio teacher always said, ' the world needs its nerds'