Night one

The absence of his bedroom furniture is most glaring and will need to be addressed pronto. The room feels imbalanced and something is missing in current furniture arrangement. Need  help to move the dresser he left, and dunno if I want to in here with all his old stickers.

No coffee will be super sad tomorrow morning.
Otherwise it's like any other night. That and oh yeah the fridge is empty and I had a dillusional thought he.d clean the stove/kitchen before he left.

I.m helping mr civic pack

But not when he.s here.  Not to kick him out but b.c he has more than he thinks and I can be part of that process.  Soon the kitchen is going to be soooooempty.
In so many ways.  I hope it will again soon be the center of my home.  And not my bed.
Need to buy radios.

This is sad.
So is thinking about the personal work I need to do.
But will hopefully put us both in better spots.

for once,making the right move, going to Alaska for my b'day---with my parents

Hope August is still a good time to go.

Went through the towels today to separate out.  He claims the drill is his, I don't think so, but let him have it.  Splitting up the kitchen pictures.  The walls are going to look so crappy with their holes.

when do i change facebook? looks like the move will be next mon/tues.

having issues working through a work relationship.  arg.  oh trying to be healthy

Sunburned if you do, sunburned if you don't.

Well not really.  But I did get sunburned yesterday (moving around the whole time I was outside) and today put on sunscreen and my face feels gross.
But I did see a red tailed hawk in the botanic garden swoop down pick up some food, and then eat it, although the food, a bird we think. Appeared to already be dead.  The garden was super pretty but far from peak blooms on trees, although the magnolias were worthwhile.  Of course many couples there together or with kids, and will just be me doing my thing for a while.
Have an mentioned how I am saying fuck it to local food when it comes to avocados?  Seriously I see these as my savior/main foods for a while, while I relearn to feed myself in a halfway decent manor.
Err maybe that should read, learn to feed myself in a halfway decent manor.

Good hawk sighting while bird watching yesterday too.  Thought the brooklyn folk festival would be all brooklyn bands. I was wrong.  And also I own a new $55 Kevlar lined tire.  Arg, but my old tire had no tread and a big hole so I needed a new one...

I.m back....

Well you so much easier to write when crap is happening in your life.

Mr civic and I are calling it splits, but we are still 'together' or whatever that means til he moves out.
He has the keys to his new apt, but doesn't.t move til may 1st.  It's certainly amicable, and trying to stay friends, but who knows.

Scared to live alone. Scared I will never leave the house or clean the house or eat decent food.  Here.s to trying to take care of myself in multiple ways.